It's not too late to add this lovely box of goodness to your Christmas list...

The yummy contents of the November/December SKNY box

When it comes to food box subscriptions, surely the first word that springs to mind is mundane, right? Whether it’s vegetables, nuts or random fine dining related herbs, we at Mumsnet Hackney are yet to have our heads turned by this whole new concept of obtaining food, that was until I met budding entrepreneur Gina Madu, mastermind of  SKNY box and fellow graduate of Google Campus business training for Mums. 

SKNY box from the outside

Firstly, relax, SKNY might be pronounced skinny but is an acronym for ‘Stronger, Knowledgable New You' which as a concept alone captured my interest (although I also liked their mantra of ‘we do not do skinny’ too). So what could possibly be delivered to your door that will create this strength and knowledge exactly? In summary the box is made up of 6 - 8 items which includes a range of snacks, food, drinks, a spice & recipe kit and a bespoke fitness plan. 

It’s one thing to meet a business brain who’s bubbly and disarmingly friendly but completely another to totally covet their business idea and this was all before I’d even received my SKNY box through the post. Now lets get down to what you really want to know, what’s inside the box?

• A packet of Sweet Coconut and Vanilla Propercorn 
• A sizeable tub of Natvia sweetener (200g)
• Rosemary and Thyme Soffles Pitta Chips 
• A pot of Kabuto Noodles
• Beauty Candy – Strawberry candies with collagen
• Nakd Cashew Cookie Bar 
• Flavourmagic Harissa Spice sachet and recipe card
• A Raw Booster sachet
• Carton of Green Lemon Hampstead Iced Tea
• A pack of Lemony Lover Oloves - that’s not a typo, just a nifty play on words.
• 30 Day Plan Fat Buster Winter Workout

In the last year having suffered a mild gluten intolerance and completed Sarah Wilson’s 'I Quit Sugar' detox, I would describe myself as quite nutrition conscious and I feel quite well versed in swiftly deciphering most food ingredients labels and confirming a snack's suitability to be devoured or hastily abandoned. Generally the main reason I would avoid something like this would be because of the likelihood of receiving a barrage of foods that are labelled as ‘low fat’ or ‘low sugar’ but are instead packed full of sweeteners or fructose to generate flavour. However, I was very nicely surprised indeed. Virtually all of these items were things that I would happily feed my children (apart from the the collagen candies and the Iced tea of course) although the main USP was actually I didn't want to share this with anyone. 

I have already been converted to the calorie free natural sweetener Natvia and found it quite hard to find in health food shops so to receive a healthy sized tub was very gratifying indeed and I will most definitely be attempting the Tzatziki recipe flavoured with harissa spice - and not just because it's main ingredient is beetroot and therefore it will be pink. The verdict on sugar content? The Iced Tea came top of the list in terms of sugar levels and the Beauty Candies are full of sweetener but these items aside I would happily devour all of this in one sitting. 

The 30 Day Fat Buster Winter Workout leaflet gives you a training schedule detailing a daily activity which includes rest from exercise every 3 days. It then talks you through the weight training moves using pictures as well as description and two high intensity interval training routines. The instructions were clear and easy to follow (despite being written in very tiny print) and each move included moderations for beginners.  

So overall I was very impressed indeed. In fact I think I may have developed a minor crush this snack box and will now commence figuring out how I can shoehorn a SKNY box subscription onto my Christmas list. 

To receive an exclusive discount for Mumsnetters of 50% off your first SKNY box - click HERE 

MUMSNET HACKNEY RECEIVED THIS SKNY BOX IN EXCHANGE FOR AN HONEST REVIEW

Who needs Black Friday when we have Shop Local Saturday.

Your comprehensive Christmas Gift Guide, with a distinctly local feel. 

That's right, at Mumsnet Hackney we are celebrating everything that is local and not just because we like shopping on our doorstep but also (and we are trying not to sound smug here) the local shops across Hackney really are worth shouting about. So, to mark this Saturday's Shop Local day, we would like to present you with our Stoke Newington Christmas Gift guide. We have walked the length and breadth of the High Street and Church Street in the name of finding some, in our view, frankly delightful gift ideas for all your family members. Don't worry, if you're not familiar with any of the shops mentioned here just click on their names to find out all their details. Enjoy!

We'll start with something for the notoriously hard-to-buy-for men in your life, be it Dads, Husbands, Uncles or Brothers...

We still can't believe we nabbed this for £15

So here's something that'll really score some serious brownie points. Of course, we know we are very spoiled to be able to get our hands on one of these from the Stoke Newington Book Shop - a signed copy of 'Six Poets from Hardy to Larkin: An anthology by Alan Bennett' at a bargain price of £15. These may well have already gone by the time you get there BUT if you do go along this Saturday you can get some book recommendations from local literary experts, as the organisers of the world famous Stoke Newington Literary Festival will be taking it over for the day- click here for more details.

Butchery courses start from £75, aprons are included!

Going with the theme of the gift of knowledge, how about giving someone in your the opportunity to hone their Christmas lunch carving skills, or simply learn how to make sausages? Get yourself along to the award winning Meat N16 Butcher and Delicatessen , not just for the Christmas bird/beef/both but also comprehensive range of Butchery Courses - Meat the Steak/Bird/Sausage or Lamb.

Shaving soap costs £9.75 and brush £32.75

When it comes to the minefield that is male grooming, this is surely one of the most luxurious items you could treat your man to. This Raktval Shaving Soap contains only natural ingredients: including almond oil; patchouli; cedarwood and fennel. It's also is paraben free and is found in gift and lifestyle shop Search and Rescue.







For the ladies in your life...

Scarf retails at £60 and hat is £40

Knitwear at Christmas, are we really that cliched? Well, when it comes in the form of designer knitwear by Antwerp brand Morrison - found in your local fashion boutique Hub - yes we certainly are! Produced in Scotland, this Howlin' hat and scarf comes in a gorgeous neutral rich grey with a flash of mustard is already on our Christmas list.

Available in a range of colours at £9 p/100g

Keeping with the theme of wool, this gift could be given to any knitting enthusiast in your life, regardless of gender. We just couldn't resist including this beautiful, top quality wool, available from knitting mecca 'Knit with Attitude'. This will also do wonders for your carbon footprint as the brilliantly named 'Wool and the Gang' is produced just up the road in Dalston.

Beautiful hand made jug, £50

Of course, for the non-knitters of this world, how about a beautiful wheel thrown, reduction fired earthenware jug from your local fashion boutique Hub made by British ceramicist Kate Hill.

Earrings start at £12 and broaches are £2

If you're looking for something unashamedly feminine, then look no further than gift shop Of Cabbages and Kings, who stock a fantastic range of jewellery by local designer, Wolf and Moon. We are already addicted to this simply gorgeous geometric, mirrored selection of broaches and earrings. Also, as part of a special Shop Local promotion, if you spend £20 in store on Saturday you will receive a free tote bag which will be upgraded to a canvas tote should you spend more than £50.

Top is £18 and leggings are £22

As we have hands on experience of being pregnant at Christmas we're pretty sure this maternity pyjama set from baby shop JoJo Maman Bebe will go down a storm with the pregnant lady in your life.
















Something for the kids...

Having already typecast ladies as being knitting enthusiasts we have had a strong word with ourselves and as a result have a rather lovely selection of non-gender specific toys that instead, hopefully more usefully, are categorised by age. Starting with baby...

Prices range from £21 to £30 depending on size

Actually, we say baby but these simply gorgeous lace up knitted boots by Padraig Cottage come in sizes up to the age of 4. These are world famous on Church Street and are found in baby and maternity wear shop and hypnobirthing venue Born.

These retail at £18

For the 3 and Ups - how about something Made in Dads Shed? No not literally, but a brand of beautiful wooden toy cars stocked by Search and Rescue. These solid wood cars are handmade with old fashioned wood working techniques, using dowls instead of screws and are coated in water-based paint.

Available for a fee of £15

Allow your little one to really make their mark with this cuddly toy that you can decorate. Better still - when you get bored you can just put it in the washing machine and start again. Suitable for ages 3 to 5, this ingenious toy is found in Route 73 Kids.

Possibly also one for your husband, these cost £30.

According to local skating expert and shop proprietor Tom - of Toms Skate Shop - it is possible to start skateboarding at around the age of 4 and this Rocket 29" Skate board is the beginners board of choice. Tom stocks the full range of these in various colours and designs. They also come with high quality, urethane wheels as standard. 

A little something extra for parents...

Purchase these online for £19.99

Having only recently raved about this product in our last review it wouldn't seem right not to include this ingenious Scooterslingz bag, produced by local designer Penny Othen. To read our very complimentary review please click HERE and to buy yourself one click HERE













And finally we couldn't do a Stokey Gift guide without including these little beauties that surely are the most 'local' of gifts you can buy...

Bag yourself one of these for £5.

Show your love for all things Stokey with this vibrant funky tote bag from Early Bird Designs - please note 'I heart Hackney' is also available. Whilst you're there also check out their fantastic range of Christmas cards and wrapping.

Get yourself to The Ark to grab one of these.

These Big Tomato cream ware mugs are found in many a gift shop, however what makes these ones sold by veritable Aladdin's cave of a gift shop The Ark so special? These have a bespoke local twist including 'Stokey girl', 'Stokey Dad' and our favourite 'Stokey bloke'. At £10.50 each you won't be stoney broke (sorry!)










Of course, this is just a tiny snapshot of the amazing array of local shops in Stoke Newington however, we really hope that when it comes to Christmas gifts this guide has given you a little local inspiration.

Family Mediation – Booming Marvellous?

To mark National Family Resolution Week Mumsnet Hackney is hosting a sponsored article by Family Mediation specialist Amina Somers who is also answering your questions in our week long Q&A. If you would like to post a question to Amina please just click here. 

The Children and Families Act 2014 encourages separating couples to resolve their disputes outside of court, including using mediation.

In April 2013, in line with this policy, the government removed legal aid for family disputes (with limited exceptions) but retained legal aid for family mediation. 

So has there been an increase in referrals to family mediation?

Anecdotal evidence from mediators suggests not.

According to The Family Mediators Association’s Legal Aid Survey there was a 53% decline in claims made for legally aided mediations between April 2013 and December 2013 compared to the same period in 2012 - 53% less (legally aided) mediations.

While mediators have criticised the government for failing to publicise that legal aid remains available for mediation are there more fundamental reasons why separating couples are not mediating?

Signposting Family Mediation

Mediators have lobbied the government for a televised public awareness campaign. Government has not been receptive having high expectations that the revamping of the Family Mediation Council website, to which all forms of signposting and promotional activity will be directed, will significantly improve public awareness of family mediation.

Difficulties in understanding why mediation works

Most disputes involve a difference in perception - the relationship has broken down but each party’s perception of the situation, how it happened and what should happen next, is different.

In disagreements these different perceptions are advanced, protected or defended by each party. Thinkers like Edward de Bono (1985: Conflicts) believe it is almost impossible for a party in the dispute (or his legal adviser) to change or shift their own perceptions by themselves.

This is also why neither the parties (or their legal advisors) are best placed to design a solution to their own problem and why De Bono says they need a third party – like a mediator - to help them. Otherwise the thinking employed by the disputing parties will remain the same.

The mediator is free (of these perceptions) to suggest ways of reconciling different perceptions by either finding common ground or by designing new perceptions that both parties can buy into.

Fear as a basis for refusing to mediate

A party’s own belief as to what will “really” happen during the mediation process may impact considerably on whether to mediate.

Clients may think that the mediator will indicate that there is no merit in the their position or a client who has felt diminished or the weaker partner in the former relationship may feel that they will not be sufficiently protected or heard in the process. Similarly if one party perceives the other as being more charismatic there may be a feeling that the mediator will be charmed into adopting that party’s position.

So it is easy to understand why a party to a dispute will want both someone to “protect” them and “advocate” for them ie a lawyer.

Where there are such fears it will be difficult to contemplate mediation.

Skilled mediators should be able to uncover these fears, deal with them directly or suggest pre mediation support before mediation begins.

Choosing a mediator

Mediators come from different professional backgrounds e.g lawyers, social workers and psychotherapists.

Good mediators have a good understanding of what enables people to reach agreement, an inventive solution focused mind, empathy and determination. After all they encounter the most challenging of human behaviour at what is often one of the lowest points in the lives of their clients.

When choosing a mediator:

• Both parties should have trust and confidence in the mediator and speak to the mediator before appointment; shortlist 2 or 3 mediators for this purpose.

• Think about whether or not the mediator sounds like someone you can work with.

• Ask the mediator questions about their approach to conflict resolution i.e how they deal with impasse or high conflict situations.

• Consider the issues and level of conflict. In high conflict cases mediators from a therapeutic background might be useful. In complex and high conflict cases two mediators with complimentary backgrounds (legal/therapeutic) may be appropriate.

• Consider pre mediation support that focus’s on expectations in mediation, explores fears and beliefs that affect the party’s confidence in the process and ways of managing unhelpful emotional responses.

• ask whether the mediator works with different mediation models ie shuttle mediation where the parties do not wish to sit in the same room as one another.

• Check the mediator’s availability - a mediator who has another professional role may need to have longer gaps between appointments.

• Establish whether the mediator offers legal aid if you think you might qualify.

• If you like a particular mediator but cannot afford the level of fees - negotiate on fees.

Legal proceedings rarely produce better relations between separating couples while research has shown that mediation produces costs savings and better long term outcomes for children of separating couples. Worth a try?

 Amina Somers consults with specialist family law firm Goodman Ray, is a Solicitor (non practising), Mediator and Therapeutic Counsellor.

www.goodmanray.com

© Amina Somers 2014

We have been begging for this to be invented and now someone has..read on for a corker of a product review and get it on your Christmas list!

The must-have accessory for all you Scooter lovers out there, you heard it here first!

It's no secret that we at Mumsnet Hackney love a product review. We are very lucky that we do generally have a small queue of very generous people happy to allow us to do what is easily the guiltiest pleasure of blogging. So what makes this product review different from the others? On this occasion MNH was so impressed with this beautifully simple scooter transporting device that I don't mind admitting that actually I totally crossed the line of professionalism and instigated this review. 

I met Scooterslingz creator Penny Othen whilst attending Google Campus for Mums, business training for parents: a veritable smorgasbord of business brains and inspiring entrepreneurs. What made Penny stand out was the fact she turned up to class with a microscooter, as you do. 

After confirming this was not her preferred mode of transport and it was in fact a prop to demonstrate her product: the nifty Scooterslingz bag, designed to easily transport your child's scooter, I was all ears. Having a dedicated scooter lover in our family in the shape of our eldest. with a buggy being my youngest son's preferred mode of transport, I regularly attempt what I can only describe as an apparatus conundrum. 

Pushing a buggy with a buggy board and a scooter slung over the handle is something I regularly struggle with. However, this is the only way available to me as I utilise the storage space under our buggy to wedge in youngest's Scuttlebug and our changing bag. Don't even get me started on attempting to take this awkward entourage of wheels onto a bus. 

I also recently had a rather unfortunate experience when walking through the park. I'd attempted to slot my sons scooter over my shoulder to leave my hands free to transport coats, helmets and other appendages. Without being too in depth here I will just say I narrowly avoided wearing the animal excrement that had inadvertently become lodged in the scooter's wheel. 

So, poo-based anecdotes aside and onto the important stuff, how exactly do you fit a mini right angle into a bag? It's a little known fact that a Microscooter's handle bars can be removed very easily. All you need to do is turn the scooter upside down and at the base between the front wheels where the T bar meets the scooter, there is a button. By holding the button down you can then un-slot the T bar, giving you a scooter in 2 pieces. 

The 'before' shot

Scooter now ready to be stowed away. 

One flat packed scooter

The bag is ergonomically shaped so you can easily slide the scooter and T bar inside. It closes with a flap that closes over the top, secured with a strap that clips neatly and snugly around the scooter. You can then literally sling the scooter onto your back and away you go. The strap is adjustable so it doesn't rattle around and, awkward shape aside, a micro scooter is as light as a feather. The bag has a hook so if you do store your child's scooter indoors you can now flat pack it and hang your scooter up. The bag's fabric is waterproof, neatly folds into it's own nifty little drawstring storage bag and is available in a selection of colours or this gorgeous patterned design. 

Naturally this innovative design comes with it's owned beautifully matched little storage bag

If you have it on good authority that Father Christmas might be bringing your child a Microscooter this year then do yourself a favour and make sure you add this to your Christmas list, as its nothing short of a life and hand saver.

For further information or to purchase a Scooterslingz bag, which retails at £19.99 please click here

Mumsnet Hackney received this product free of charge in exchange for an honest review.

Are you feeding your children well?

Left to right: Dr Emma Haycraft, Gaby Morris and Jill Wheatcroft 

Last thursday MNH was very excited to be invited to a talk arranged by childcare experts Riverside Cares titled 'Feed your children well'. As a cooking enthusiast continually short on inspiration I assumed it would be some cooking tips, with nutritional advice thrown in. Little did I realise that even though I was about to be served some healthy portions of both of these, I would also learn the fundamental principles around children's eating habits and the common pitfalls which, as a parent, I experience when feeding my children on a daily basis. In other words: gold dust. I hope I can summarise just a fraction of the incredible information around the psychology of eating and food that was shared. It won't be difficult as I immediately went home and papered my kitchen walls with the notes I took.

Professional childcare expert and co-founder of Riverside Cares (who have been providing a comprehensive range of childcare facilities since 1989) Jill Wheatcroft kicked things off with some sobering statistics, including that 1 in 5 children of reception age are obese, a figure that has been steadily increasing since 1995. According to the WHO, childhood obesity is now one of the most serious public health challenges of the 21st century. I didn't realise that at the moment my children, who are both under the age of 5, should be doing a minimum of 3 hours physical activity a day! 

Jill then handed the floor over to Senior lecturer in Psychology at Loughborough university Dr Emma Haycraft, who highlighted some of the feeding issues experienced by parents and children which fall into 5 main categories: refusing food, unhealthy food preferences, pressure to eat, food as a reward and food restriction. 

Food refusal is something my children certainly demonstrate on a frequent basis, including food that they will have happily tucked into the previous week. This is linked to neophobia - a fear of new things, an innate instinct we retain from our caveman days when we had to exercise considerably more caution around what we ate, compared to nowadays, in case our foraging efforts were of dubious origins. It takes around 20 attempts of presenting a child with a certain type of food for a child to categorically confirm their dislike for that food. Anyone who has found there are certain foods they just didn't eat until later in life will understand this concept. I didn't really start eating cheese until my 20s. But as a parent where do you begin to track something like this? Why am I asking this? Of course there's an app for that (and an amazing website too for that matter). Also, when you present a particular type of food you might  find that your child might not enjoy boiled carrots but they will eat carrot sticks or mashed carrot. A little bit of creativity beautifully captured in my favourite saying of the day 'think outside the plate'. Another fantastic idea, which anyone who has done baby led weaning will relate to, is allowing your children to play with their food. I don't mean the kind of thing that as I child I was continually reprimanded for, but again being a little bit creative - potato printing, squeezing the juice out of raspberries or beetroot and then painting with it. 

It is not uncommon for children to have unhealthy food preferences and Emma's explanation for this was compelling in its simplicity. Children are born with an innate preference for sweet things because breast milk is sweet. Often by explaining to children the potential super powers they will gain by eating certain foods (such as carrots help you see in the dark) is great for motivating your child to eat certain foods. However, this links in beautifully with the next section regarding pressuring your child to eat. This sounds harsh but actually it's something I frequently find myself doing. Urging my children to clean their plates or just simply to eat up their vegetables. The two key points to consider here are: firstly that children are very good at understanding when they are full and that this may have no correlation with them finishing what's on their plate. As parents we must trust our children to know when they are full. Whilst gentle encouragement is fine, by continually urging your child to clean their plate they will stop listening to their internal cues telling them that they are full and follow external cues like the amount of food in front of them, which could lead to a life time of over eating; The second point is once again delightfully condensed into 2 words: portion control. A rough guide to the size of each portion of food being served on your child's plate should be around the same size as the palm of your child's hand. 

The section that as a parent I related to the most is that of giving food as a reward. This is something I was brought up on and I often use to manage my own motivation (there will be biscuits at the end of this blog post). Bribing your children to eat their vegetables by offering a pudding-based incentive, escape from sitting at the dinner table if they just have one more piece of broccoli or treats if they are upset or refusing to get dressed/get in the car/get in their buggy are a daily occurrence in my household. Rewarding good behaviour with food creates emotion around eating which can then lead to emotional eating. Rewards should come in the form of a trip to the park or a small toy for example. Also, consider the logic from a child’s perspective, that carrots surely must be horrendous if they warrant a reward such as cake or ice cream once they’ve been eaten. 

Immediately on hearing the term 'food restriction' I thought this would not be something that I could relate to but on further explanation I realised it was something I do frequently. Food restriction falls into 2 categories: overt (for example 'you've had 2 biscuits you're not having anymore) and covert (making unhealthy food or snacks quite simply unavailable in the first place) So by openly refusing your child to have something that they know is stored away on a high shelf makes it even more desirable to them. However, if you give them a 'treat' but it's made clear that there are no more left then this makes it easier for them to understand 'treats' and they consequently feel less restricted. 

The main question this left for me was 'when is the time to give treats in the form of sweets or chocolate and should they even be referred to as ‘treats’? Of course if there was a straight forward answer to this then I’m pretty sure we’d all be doing it already however, reminding your child that sweet treats are special and not an everyday occurrence and not giving in to a perseverant toddlers or offering sweets as a reward is a good starting place. I know for me one of the greatest things that impacted on the volume of treats I gave to my children was moving the treat tin out of MY reach. 

To find all of the above information in far more articulate detail along with how to download the app please go to http://childfeedingguide.co.uk

Mumsnet Hackney was allowed to attend this event free of charge courtesy of Riverside Cares in exchange for an honest review